Dying is not just for the elderly, the sick, and the reckless anymore. We’ve reached a seemingly irreversible point in time when your last breathing act can be something as routine as going to work or school, dining at a restaurant, attending church, or even more blasphemous, dancing and singing along to your favorite music. People generally don’t like to think about dying, let alone talk about it. We’re kind of superstitious about the topic. We convince ourselves that if we don’t talk about it, maybe it won’t happen. Spoiler alert – there’s no Witness Protection Program to harbor you from the greedy, insatiable clutches of death. Everyone must face the music sooner or later. You might as well own it and make a production out of it, so you can face it with dignity and fanfare and leave your family, friends, and even your enemies a musical farewell to remember you by.
I posed the following question to a select group of individuals from Twitter who've inadvertently contributed on a regular basis to my web page
The People On Music, a growing collection of music-themed tweets I gather to illustrate and celebrate the tightly woven, unbroken thread of music running through us all and linking us together, regardless of our backgrounds and experiences:
If you could choose one song to play at your funeral to close out the ceremony, give you a proper send-off to the great beyond (if there is one), and leave your friends with a lasting
memory of you, what song would that be and why?
The answer to this question was an opportunity for those who contributed, to face one of our greatest fears, to have the last word, and to have a semblance of control over an uncontrollable outcome. It was their chance to envision their funeral as an expertly scripted and tightly choreographed scene from a television show or movie that walks that fine line between a maudlin ceremonial display of grief and reflection and an expression of real life emotion; something similar to Opie's funeral scene below from Sons of Anarchy scored with "The Lost Boy" by Greg Holden.
Isn't it a bit comforting to think a musical farewell like this, carefully preselected by you, might make your final curtain call a little less menacing and worth the time and effort it took to get to your final destination? Whether this was their motivation or not, several brave individuals with a deep-seated affection for music and the role it plays in life and death and everything in between, accepted the challenge to upstage the Grim Reaper during his big scene when their time comes. Here are the songs they've chosen as the closing number of their final show. Find out why they are the perfect farewell songs for each of them and click on the videos to hear their final numbers.
@MarieLoerzel
Song: It's The End of the World As We Know It - R.E.M.
Why: There's a direct contrast between the happy, energetic beat and the depressing, nonsensical lyrics. What does it mean? Or is it all random nonsense?
Either way, there's something about it that makes you feel good. It's a great metaphor for life.
@scot4bz
Song: Daughters - John Mayer
Why: Ultimately, I would think I'd have a song that speaks to the most important thing in the world to me, my reason for being, and the impetus for all I do - John Mayer’s "Daughters," since my one and only is my world, and the finest work I have ever done.
The moment I first heard this song, it spoke to the unbreakable bond between my daughter and I.
@crimsoninked
Song: In My Life - The Beatles
Why: This song embodies the way I want to be remembered, and the way I remember everything from my life, here and maybe beyond...if there is one.
@JKickinit30
Song: Ocean - John Butler
Why: The reason I picked this song is that no matter how bad things seem, this song lifts me up. It's a wave that keeps building and washing you clean. There's so much emotion in this song which has no words.
Also, if it's the last song I get to play, I want it to be a 12-minute song.
They can't get rid of me that quickly.
@funnyhix
Song: Beam Me Up - Pink
Why: I chose "Beam Me Up" because I suffered the loss of a loved one unexpectedly. I never had the opportunity to say goodbye. It's been 12 years, but the hurt and sadness are still very real and ever present. This song struck a chord after I had a dream where I saw him. It was just a silly dream like most dreams are, but when I saw him there, I knew it wouldn't last, so I made him hug me and that was the closest I got to a goodbye. I saw him for just a minute and no words were spoken but that was all I needed.
@distracted_monk
Song: The Town and the City - Los Lobos
Why: This song was used in Sopranos in a scene where Chris finally pulls himself together before Tony murders him. It’s not my favorite track ever. That’s impossible. I have hundreds of songs I love the same. But I think this is a good funeral song. It has a feeling of making it through and appreciating having food on the table, even if you had to work for someone else.
And also, it has a feeling of togetherness with your group, your people. We went through thislife thing together.
@offbeatoliv
Song: The Great Gig in the Sky - Pink Floyd
Why: "The Great Gig in the Sky" will let those attending your funeral know that you aren't afraid of death. It also may encourage mourners to hold their lighters in the air. To me, this is the ultimate send off.
@TheTweetOfBob
Song: I’m Gonna Miss You Like Crazy - A Sundae Drive
Why: Through the metaphor of summer, this song captures the brevity of life and the irreversible finality of our fleeting youth and innocence as it slips through our fingers. The vivid imagery swells around you like a heavy fog, both nostalgic and ominous. It brings summers past and childhood spent all back home, whether for good or bad.
It offers you one last chance to capture these cherished moments in a jar
like fireflies and preserve their long, lost blinking splendor.
The closing extended guitar solo is a living exclamation point, enunciating the eerie drone of this menacing, yet mesmerizing lullaby. This song is a taunting reminder of how as a child you wished your summers and your youth would never end. If only they both could linger like the guitar solo which draws you in and grabs on tight as if to caution you to appreciate the finite moments and hold onto them as long as you can. The unavoidable truth is childhood is the summertime of your life. You don’t appreciate or savor either one enough while you’re knee deep in them, and you miss them both like crazy when they’re gone. This song is my way of saying I will miss the people I leave behind more than they could ever miss me.
@IamEveryDayPpl
Song: You Still Surprise Me - Shaun Cassidy
Why: It would have to be this one. Shaun Cassidy was my first love and a bright spot in an otherwise dismal childhood, and he is kind to me here all these many years later. I danced with my son to this song at his wedding. Don't judge me, LOL. A girl never forgets her first love.
@Jake_Vig
Song: Unstoppable – Keaton Simons
Why: The mood and lyrics are somber yet hopeful. It's about someone leaving, but you will definitely see them again.
@DevilryFun
Song: She’s a Rainbow – The Rolling Stones
Why: This was harder than I thought! I wanted tons of songs, not just one. At least one song from each of my favorite artists. I chose The Rolling Stones' "She’s a Rainbow." I love the piano. I love the playful sound of children chanting. It’s a happy song, and I would want my family and friends to laugh and share the happy moments they had with me, rather than to be sad.
I’d want them think of those happy moments when they see a rainbow.
@underchilde
Song: Bathroom Wall - Faster Pussycat
Why: This might sound like I didn’t put a lot of thought into this, but I did. I looked at my favorite bands, some really great blues musicians and songs that really move me, but absolutely zero felt right. Then, on my drive to work, I was listening to a glam band playlist, and "Bathroom Wall" by Faster Pussycat came on. It’s truly an odd song to close out a funeral.
Anyone who knows me, however, knows I’m a bit weird and that I like to do things my own way.
Funerals are sad; they’re heavy. I was thinking: All these long faces, reflecting on a life ended, and this ridiculous song about a guy calling a random girl, whose number he finds on a bathroom wall starts playing. It’s so out of place, that it would make people laugh. To me, that’s perfect. I mean, nothing heals a heart faster than music and laughter.
@kimtopher22
Song: Baby I’m A Star - Prince
Why: I have suffered a great deal of loss over the course of my life, through a variety of methods, and it has brought me to the person I am today. I understand our time here is fleeting. Tomorrow is promised to no one, and I try to gather and appreciate the weight of seconds for the precious commodity they are. I thought about the tender and heartfelt songs that would make people cry, and I decided, FUCK THAT. I would hate for anyone to cry when I’m gone. I want my life to be celebrated. I want to be remembered for the storyteller and adventurer and person most willing to laugh at myself, so I wanted to choose something fun. I never had as much enjoyment dancing to a song as much as I did "Baby, I’m A Star" by Prince. I know it seems ludicrous, but you can’t be unhappy when you’re listening to that song. It’s spirited and wonderful and full of sass.
"Hey, check it all out
Better look now or it just might be too late
My lucks gonna change tonight
There's gotta be a better life
Take a picture sweetie, I ain't got time to waste"
There’s gotta be a better life. I was raised Catholic, and I’ve always felt like there was something bigger than me. As I’ve become the age I am now, I am less certain than ever of what that is, but I believe I’ll find out. And if I don’t, no harm, no foul. And I’ve never wasted time on people who aren’t interested in me. Doesn’t make them bad. My time is too valuable. I need people I love who love me for who I am and what I bring as I do for them. I’m tremendously fortunate. My tribe is full of the finest people on earth, who care about me despite myself.
"Baby, baby, baby
Oh, baby, I'm a star
Baby, baby, baby
Somebody
We all are a star, yeah"
We are ALL stars. We all bring something to this tiny rock hurling through space. We all have gifts and hopes and joys and sorrows and have something to say and matter to people, and if there is one takeaway that I leave behind, it’s that I value every person I love for what they bring. And that they smile and laugh one more time dealing with my ridiculous ass, before they say goodbye.
@Cheeky996
Song: Into the Mystic - Van Morrison
Why: I would choose the song "Into the Mystic" by Van Morrison. I think it is a beautiful send-off song for my gypsy soul wherever it may wander off to in search of its final home. The song, reminds me of happy times, a time of innocent love and carefree days. I hope that when people hear it, they will feel the magic that is Morrison’s voice as I always did (do) and it rocks their soul while the lyrics, set their spirit soaring.
@hergoodness
Song: Thank You - Led Zeppelin
Why: I selected Led Zeppelin’s "Thank You." It is beautiful, thoughtful, and romantic. It is a beautiful picture of all my most precious relationships. My husband and I, "hand in hand we walk the miles" and my children, "If mountains crumble to the sea, there will still be you and me." "My Love is strong," I think it’s a lovely picture of how I’m living my life... "Happiness, no more be sad. Happiness, I’m glad."
@bevandeveire
Song: To Leave Something Behind - Sean Rowe
Why: His voice reminds me of a lost religion only the forsaken can find. If I could leave anything behind for those I love, it would be hope.
Hopefully, these music selections and the personal reasons behind choosing them have stimulated you to contemplate your life and mortality and set the creative process in motion to choreograph your own final scene. Don't just die silently. Add a closing track to the album that was your life. Leave this world with a flourish, a final number you can count on to leave your family and friends with memories of you that will last until they spin their own song someday.
If you enjoyed reading the insights of those who opened up and shared some of their most intimate thoughts on music, life, and death, you can click on their photos beside their song selections to access their Twitter pages and read more of their 140-character genius, wit, and profundity. You can also visit "The People On Music" page for their reflections on music.
If you would like to read more music articles, click here.